OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW BETTER YOUNG ENOUGH TO LEARN - how to add an apron to your leaf


At the last minute before your husband's fun loving family shows up for dinner
you run to your master bedroom trying to remember where the extra leaf for
the kitchen table was stored. Finally with victory you find it stashed in the back of the closet,
behind your husband's laundry bin. Thankfully he uses the floor for his laundry
and not the bin so getting the leaf out should be quick and easy. 


Once you slip through the hanging clothes and stubbing your toe on the sewing machine
also sitting on the floor on the closet, which reminds you that you should have
hemmed the dress you had planned to where this evening, you pull out the leaf with victory
still on your side and head straight for the dining table. Thank god the kids haven't
come in from their busy day in the yard of hosing the dog down to set the dishes out yet.
Now it's just a slight bit of acrobatic moves to get the table pulled apart by yourself
and get the leaf in place.


 Seriously!! ... now you're confronted with a big gaping hole pointed right at the door way
where your in-laws will be entering the room.

"I could turn the table and hope no one will see" ...

but that will block Becky's escape to her room when
aunt Patty starts complaining about her fancy $200 shoes that don't fit right
and cousin Jeremy staring inappropriatly (really he just has a lazy eye)

"The good table cloth will cover it up and solve all the problems!" ...

There is no time to start looking. The casserole timer is going off and the rug has not
been vacuumed for that would disrupt the game that Henry is watching.
Once you give in and start tearing open drawers and cupboards you find the good table cloth
still has mustard stains from Jack's birthday party that you had hoped might vanish if left alone.



If you are tired of this always happening to you,
simply follow these 7 steps. 


#1 Measure the height and length you need in a new apron board.
#2  You will need to get 2 boards cut to fit the measurements you have taken,
1 for each end.


#3 With some coarse sand paper smooth the edges on your new boards.
#4 Measure the distance in from the edge where they need to go.
#5 Screw the boards into place using corner brakets. 


#6 Double check how it looks by installing the leaf in your table.
#7 Once everything looks good paint the new apron piece to match your table.

A few unpractical alternatives might include:
Burn everything you cook then you won't be asked to cook dinner.
Don't clean your house then no one will want to come for dinner
Marriage comes with in-laws, think carefully before deciding.


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7 comments:

  1. Love your sense of humor. Sounds like life aroung here. I really don't get whey they didn't put aprons on the leaves in the first place, but I have noticed many did not. Great idea.

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  2. I never would of thought of that, great idea, although for me adding an apron to my leaf just means tossing my dish towel on the table.

    ~Bliss~

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  3. Okay, that's kinda of a "doh, why-didn't-I-think-of-that" moment! I have a table with 5 leaves that need aprons. Better get started!

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  4. Thanks for making me laugh out loud! This is a hilarious (and very useful) post.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love this post. It's a great idea and I love your sense of humor!

    ReplyDelete

THANK YOU ALL!